Yes, I give my kid (toddler at that) ice cream. I also let her eat frozen yogurt. She's had cookies and french fries. But, she also eats home cooked meals - (Dada legit makes her mussels and pasta for lunch!) I made her baby food and currently make her popsicles (greek yogurt and berries). She's eaten take out pizza, but our norm is homemade pizza (dough and all) from scratch every Friday. She drinks whole milk - not organic - and water daily, but she has tasted juice. She knows who Mickey Mouse is, but is clueless about the Disney princesses. At times she chooses her own clothes to wear and her outfit usually consists of some sort of dress with crocs. Fake crocs. Imitations that I got for $4.97 at KMart's going-out-out-of-business sale. She owns Adidas high tops and Toms, but 75% of her clothes have been hand-me-downs. Her play kitchen is a hand-me-down and her little tikes baby cradle was found for $2.00 at a thrift store. She still uses a pacifier or a "taci" as she calls it, but I try to limit it to sleep and car rides. She drives me crazy, but I love her more. Sometimes I lose my cool. She goes in time out. I've said that her behaviors are "naughty". Hell, I've flat out called her naughty. But, I don't like to use the word "fresh". Sometimes she screams and cries and throws herself around on the ground after she's done something naughty, and sometimes she apologizes immediately (of her own doing) or says "mama, kiss!" or "mama, hug!" Sometimes I argue with her about things. For example, tonight I tried to wait it out until she'd cleaned up all her toys before we moved on to the next thing- but I ended up caving and doing it myself. Sometimes she's in bed by 7:00pm, and sometimes
we're visiting family and it results in a nearly 10:00pm bedtime.
Sometimes she falls right to sleep in her crib with zero fussing, other nights she cries
for nearly 15 minutes. My heart breaks during those minutes, but
sometimes she needs to be in her space and me in mine. And, some nights
she wakes up at 1:00am and calls "Mama, mama.." from her crib and I walk
in without question, scoop her up, and snuggle to sleep with her in my
bed. Through all of this I at times wonder: Am I teaching her the wrong thing? Maybe. But, as I reflect on all this and try not to compare myself to others or what is "supposed to be best", I realize that, if nothing else, we have a relationship of moderation. And love. Lots of love.
You may scoff at half of what I wrote. Or, you may think that I'm terrible because my daughter can sing along with The Backyardigans, or turn on my iphone or say "Mama.. text dada" But, I just like to think of her as wicked smart. She can follow along with dances, she can sing along with Taylor Swift's "We are never ever getting back together" and she legit tries to do the "cup song" (youtube cimorelli - cups .. it's Cora's favorite). She likes mama's ipad, but she also loves to run around outside. She can slide an iphone on like nobody's business - but then she puts it on her shoulder and uses her imagination and talks. She may ask to watch "Mickey Mouse!" but she also loves to search for horsies outside (yeah, we live in NH). She's inventive in her play kitchen, using a pot holder to open the oven door and she sneaks kisses on her baby doll's head at random. She's full of love and kind words. She always says please and thank you (well, almost always) and tonight, when she was "do mama's hair!" she randomly turned my face toward her and said "Beautiful, Mama!" So yes, she may be full of song lyrics and can spot Mickey Mouse a mile away, but she's also full of love. Lots of love. And hey, I'll take a dancing, hair-doing, cup-attempting, dress wearing, iphone holding little angel who calls me beautiful any day.
